Falcons Hit Comes Back to Haunt Eagles

Everything looked all good. McNabb came back after the devastating loss with two victories. Now, the ghost of the mighty falcon has come back to haunt McNabb. Donovan McNabb has an abdominal strain that will need surgery, says his trainer. How long can McNabb fight the pain? Chad Lavalais was fined 7500 smackers for the incident that was not even called a penalty.

Eagles Can't Handle This..........

Randy Moss stated in his pressconference: "The Eagles Can't Handle This."

Only 39 Days Left Until All the Fabulous Costumes Are Gone

Andy Reid - First Male Spokesperson for Jenny Craig

Andy Reid, coach of the Philadelphia Eagles, will officially become the next spokesperson for Jenny Craig. Coach Reid currently weighed in at a hefty 485 lbs. He stated, " My goal is to weigh around 185lbs." I want to become an inspiration in one of the fattest cities in America. Whats next Reid, a session with the guys from the queer eye.

JOHNNY GILL BI-HOMEWRECKER.....

Los Angeles -- The ex-girlfriend of New Edition and LSG singer Johnny Gill is now speaking out about her recent split up with the singer . She tells Atlanta Gossip that Johnny is struggling with his sexuality and that Hollywood has put pressure on him to be straight. "Johnny and I broke up earlier this after I became curious about his friendship/relationship with the actor/comedian Eddie Murphy," she said. "Johnny and Eddie have always been very close friends, but I could not compete with their relationship. It was strange... I can't even explain it," she tells Atlanta Gossip.

Other sources tell (AG) that Johnny Gill is actually living in Eddie Murphy's property in CA. A posting on blackvoices.com entertainment forum says this: Rumors are circulating throughout Hollywood about Eddie's divorce battle. Nicole got sick of putting up with him and Johnny Gill. People had warned her years ago about the downlow rumors, even one of her close family members, but she chose not to believe them until she witnessed it. Eddie had got to the point where he didn't care. He often told her that he was the breadwinner and to stop asking him stupid questions about where he was going and who he was with. He became so brazen, Johnny came over to her house every holiday, sitting at the head of the table with Nicole and the kids. Tevin Campball, Sugar Ray, Tyler Perry, and Shemar Moore are also heavily involved in the scenario. They even tried to recruit Mike Tyson (when he had money) but it wasn't his scene. Johnny is pathetic, he was with all these men and did not benefit. Before he returned to New Edition, he was so broke, he lived in Sugar Ray's guest house and I heard his wife wasn't happy about it.

At the New Edition Album release party, sources say Johnny got extremely drunk and made a pass at Diddy. They also stated that the following gentlemen are involved in their circle of DL brothers: Arsenio Hall, Johnny Morton ( football player), and Benny Medina.

Will hockey survive?

CCCP Scientists Declare Wet T-shirts "прохладный"

Last week in Eastern Europe, a team of Slovakian scientists has discovered that wet t-shirts are "прохладный" (which is roughly translated to English as "cool"). These scientists have since been working tirelessly around the clock to further prove this astonishing finding true.

Mayor Street Introduces New Version of Word for Philadelphia Public Schools

In effort to raise test scores in Philadelphia, Mayor John Street has issued a mandatory requirement that all public schools in Philadelphia use his new version of Word. Mayor Street has teamed up with gangsta rapper 50 Cent and now he proudly presents Word: Write letterz n shit, yo. This new software automatically translates ebonics into correct English.

Rapper 50 Cent, elementary school dropout, showed the students of Philadelphia how this innovative technology works. He stated," Mo chickenheads ain't fronting no bling on do droors. After being translated by the new Word, this statement reads, " I hope I don't get a disease from those unfaithful prostitutes I slept with.

Coleman and Hasselhoff to remake "Tango and Cash"

International Mega-star David Hasselhoff and Little Black-guy Gary Coleman are teaming up for the up-coming Tango and Cash remake. Interestingly enough, Hasselhoff agreed to do the film only if he could work along side his boyhood idol, Emmanuel Lewis. Unfortunately, Webster rejected the gig due to a previous engagement. The former star of Baywatch and Knight Rider, in a bold move, then agreed to star in the movie if producers could get "the other little black guy from the '80's" to fill in for Lewis. Entertainment Tonight reports that Coleman has been living with Sylvester Stallone for the past 4 months, in hopes to fully grasp his role as Officer Ray Tango. Hasselhoff, however, has not yet been in contact with Kurt Russell about researching his role as Gabe Cash. It has been speculated that the two "hate each other's f--king guts", explains ET anchorwoman Mary Hart. The film has been slated for a Spring 2007 release and neither actor's salary has been disclosed.

Old dude keeps it real since early 1930's

This elderly fellow, Ian H. Fishback, has been reportedly macking bitches since March of 1934. Researchers report that Fishback, a retired crab boat captain, has an uncanny knack of getting into the ladies' pants - young and old alike. He has run the gambit on almost every age demographic, nationality, race and creed imaginable. "Ass is ass is ass, thats what I always say", says Fishback, "the darker the berry, the sweeter the juice". Scientists determine that this wonderful non-discriminating bastard, nicknamed 'Zip' because of the sound his zipper makes when he removes his trousers, is the oldest-known living player in captivity in North America. Old 'Zip' has been wrecking boxes and breaking hearts throughout the entire east coast and as far west as Kansas City, Missouri. Fishback, an 87 year old native of Baltimore, claims that the only thing better than the BBQ ribs in Kansas City is the vagina. In his large basement, he has a glorious collection of postcards and various souvenirs on display from the numerous cities and towns in which he has made time with the ladyfolk. "The best lovin' is nameless and faceless", answered Fishback when asked why he doesn't have any pictures or personal memorabila from his previous conquests or vast stable of hoes, "I don't like to make it too personal between myself and the poontang ... bitches ain't nothing but trouble".

Will the Eagles Get Stomped Again ???

The Philadelphia Crowd grew very cold and silent after the devestating blow by the mighty Falcon. The Fans said it would be an undefeated season. Will the 49ers lay out Owens and give him a hospital bed next to McNabb. I'm saying yes. 0-2

Mike Vick Owns the Eagles

Schuylkill River - Do the fisherman really eat the fish